the dawn of us
by gaara-nara
Summary: au/college [ sasusaku ] one unintentional night causes everything to fall apart for her while everything falls together for him


_relax, you know him. this will go well,_ sakura told herself for the millionth time as she tried to slow her breathing and calm what nerves she had left. she leaned over and pushed the home button on her phone to find she had exactly ten minutes to be in her car, on the other side of campus, and down the road to a bar that she wasn't even sure she had dressed correctly for. With a sigh she searched around the top of the vanity for her makeup.

before her hand left the screen though, she felt a light vibration and saw the screen light up.

 **SASUKE UCHIHA:**

 **HEY, I GOT HERE A LITTLE EARLY. HOPE THAT'S OK. SEE YOU SOON?**

 _of course this would happen, of course._

sakura pushed the loose strands of tousled hair behind her ear and looked into the mirror to fix the eyeliner above her green eyes, noticing how they sparkled against the emerald top she picked out. she grabbed the light red lipstick and applied a thin layer to her lips, making a flirty face in the mirror and then laughing at the effort she was putting into this.

 _it's a bar, sakura. he invited you to get a drink with him since midterms are over, that is all. he only sees you as a friend._

this reminder caused her gaze to fall disappointedly for a moment but her iPhone buzzed again with his previous message and she quickly moved to grab her coat and headed toward the door, almost tripping over the mound of clothes in the middle of her room (the many outfit choices that hadn't been picked).

On the drive there, she shuffled through her playlists but they only managed to blare out sad tunes and depressing lyrics. She knew her anxiety was rising but could not understand why because she knew him already. She knew that tonight was just for fun and a friendly suggestion, really.

Even as she got out and headed into the doors of the bar, she had a small shake to her legs and a tight feeling in her chest. Her heart really seemed to think this was a lot more than just a drink. But she felt all the stress and worry melt away when her eyes found his figure placed in a small booth back against the wall. He must have felt someone looking him over because, after an upward glance, he spotted her and immediately waved her over to the table.

"hey! sorry i was a little late." she stammered out, surprising even herself with how quickly she could just pick up conversation with him; whereas everything else today had felt forced.

he faintly grinned and waved the apology away.

"i was the one who arrived earlier than planned."

"oh that's—" she stopped her reply awkwardly as the waitress arrived at the table and asked what she could get for them.

once the waitress had walked back to the bar counter, sakura turned her view back to sasuke's and couldn't help but notice the difference in his expression whenever it was just the two of them; it was as if all his rough edges just softened entirely. after a second she could see that his lips were moving and blinked momentarily trying to process what he might have said.

 _great, he is making conversation as usual and you are once again stuck with your head in the clouds, consumed in all these ridiculous ideas. heh, his lips really are nice though…_

with a tiny shake of her head, she giggled a bit and looked up into his eyes, hoping he would take the hint and repeat himself.

their eye contact lingered longer than they had realized. they were only interrupted when the waitress sat their drinks down in front of them (while she very obviously cleared her throat).

"anything else i can get for you?" the lady encouraged with a stare at sasuke and glare at sakura.

"no, thank you." he answered politely, without breaking eye contact with those green eyes across the table. a minute or so of silence followed the waitress having left the two of them.

"you have no idea, do you?"

"what do you mean, sakura?"

she almost lost her train of thought at the sound of her name on his lips, _coming out of that mouth_.

"how you could basically get any girl in the palm of your hands?" she asked with a little more frustration than she ever wanted to let on to. she caught how he had noticed her emotionally loaded question because she watched a wave of confusion and distress wash over his face.

"ah, that isn't quite the way things have been going recently."

she pressed on, curious to know more about this side of him. "oh, trouble in love land?"

his short chuckle caught her a bit off guard and left her blushing at the pure innocence in his tone. "oh and yours is going better?"

soon enough they were both sitting their bottles back down on the table, next to the three others piled beside each of their coasters.

maybe it was the alcohol buzzing through her veins and heightening her senses but she could have swore in that moment, with him looking outside the window, completely unaware of her gaze, vulnerable in every way, this… this was when he was most beautiful.

 _beautiful,_ she thought. _beautiful isn't a very masculine term but that is what he is._

"oh god, you're beautiful." she accidentally muttered aloud.

his eyes moved slowly but surely over to hers and for a second, she couldn't seem to place what emotion he was displaying. she could feel a lot of things in those moments of quiet: fear, embarrassment, and breathlessness but she could not feel her face anymore. she wondered if it matched her lipstick by now and if it would continue to only redden until his soft, raspy voice broke through the air.

"sakura…"

she had felt the whole world fade away again, could only see him and those dark, piercing eyes searching deep down in her soul.

"what did you say just then, sakura…?" his voice was soft but she could hear every syllable echo throughout her bones. with three words lingering just behind her lips, pressing their way on her tongue, and tingling down into her stomach, she opened her mouth.

"sasuke, i-i.." but her words were cut off as their friend ino plunked down into the spot beside sasuke in the booth.

sakura was thankful ino was finishing up her call, as she honestly needed a minute to just breathe and process what feelings she had bursting throughout her body.

as soon as ino had hung up from her phone though, she made a noise from her throat that caused both sasuke and sakura to follow her vision and find their hands on the table. the tiny distance between their fingertips across the span of the table, the clear intention to close the gap, and then the slow withdraw of his hands, caused Sakura to pull hers entirely off and into her lap.

she had sat there blankly for a few minutes, aware ino was making casual conversation with sasuke but too drained already to look up and partake.

"hey, doesn't that sound fair, forehead?" ino purred out at her.

sakura shrugged and replied faintly, "what? i wasn't really paying attention…"

"i was just telling sasuke here that if he brought you here for a drink, he should at least take you on a real date." her eyes glittered as she continued, "or he should take me on one."

sakura looked directly at sasuke and tried to see what his thoughts on this proposition were but she could plainly see how nice her two friends looked together as she sat on the opposite side, taking in the full view.

she couldn't understand why her heart had to have all these silly feelings and ideas because right now they were only causing her more pain.

"whatever he wants," she mustered up the courage to say.

ino cheerfully put her arm around his and smiled brilliantly, talking about how it was confirmed then.

sakura didn't seem to know how to take her eyes off of their intertwined arms and she was beginning to feel a little sick. so she grabbed her satchel and got out of her side of the booth; the side she had been so eager to sit in earlier tonight but now couldn't get out of fast enough.

"hey, where are you going?" she heard the minor confusion in his voice and turned back around to tell them she just had to use the restroom.

on the walk there, her legs seem to want to give out and when she finally got inside the stall, she half collapsed onto the closed toilet seat. the tears came before she even had time to moan out in misery over how the evening had changed so quickly. she sat all snotty and drenched with tears, until her heart rate slowed back down to normal. now she finally opened the door and walked to the bathroom mirror to touch up her makeup and let the redness under her eyes and on her nose lighten.

as she walked her way back up the aisle, she looked at the booth and found sasuke half-smiling at ino and their arms still intertwined. with a fresh twinge of pain, she walked up to the side of the table and acted as if she were checking her watch.

"oh! it is so late. i need to get going."

ino almost laughed at this, "come on, sakura! it is a friday night."

but sakura had already waved lightly at them and headed to the door, opening and closing it behind her. she was walking briskly down the sidewalk, hoping to get into the safety of her room before the tears came again.

"hey! hey sakura please wait." she stopped though because it was his voice this time. she almost lost it then but tried to hold her composure and turned again to face him.

"what is it sasuke?"

his eyes searched back and forth between hers and raw emotion leaked out when he spoke again. "is… is this what you want?"

sakura stared back at him and wondered with all her heart if it truly was. all she had ever wanted was for him to be happy, really, and if that meant even without her… "it's fine, sasuke. goodnight." and before he could say anything else, she turned and walked on into the night, with tears pouring down each cheek.

little did she know, the decision she had made because it felt right was the very reason everything for him started to feel _very_ wrong.


End file.
